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Funeral Speech

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Robert View Drop Down
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Joined: 04 Jun 2011
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  Quote Robert Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Funeral Speech
    Posted: 04 Jun 2011 at 03:14

Can you provide a guideline and help on how to write a funeral speech?

I am to give a eulogy speech and I really don't know where to start.

Thanks!

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Jonathan Stock View Drop Down
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Joined: 06 May 2011
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  Quote Jonathan Stock Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 Jun 2011 at 05:54

Hi Robert,

welcome to the 123PPT Community and the PowerPoint Forum.

When a loved one dies and passes on Robert, it is often very hard to come to terms with the loss of losing someone close to you.

When a family member dies, for example a mother, father, sister, or brother it can be very difficult to come to terms with losing a person that you may have shared your whole life with.

Often we feel we need to say some words at the funeral. Many often write a funeral speech. Others prefer a funeral poem. For others the grief of losing someone is so great that they are unable to speak in fear of emotions, and so try hard to hold things inside.

If you feel comfortable and able to deliver a speech at the funeral, my first advice would be that before you even begin to contemplate writing a funeral speech...Stop!

Go outside. Go for a walk. Drive the car out of the city. Go somewhere where you can be alone and breathe easy.

One of the greatest mistakes made by people writing a eulogy is they are already upset and have many emotions inside them when they write so they increase these emotions and become even more upset and often distraught.

When you are alone Robert, and when you feel more comfortable with the task, I would suggest initially simply thinking about some treasured memories, precious moments, or memorable occassions that you shared together.

There are many common themes to a "funeral speech / eulogy", and many of eulogies often center around:

 
Tribute
Where the achievements of somebody’s life or highlights of many of their accomplishments and deeds are often of great focus. It is very typical when someone "famous" dies, and you hear about how they were one of the greatest footballers of their generation, for example, or were dedicated to saving animal lives etc.
It is also very common that the Tribute funeral speech or Tribute eulogy is the form adopted in many newspaper obituaries.
 

Legacy
A Legacy funceral speech or Legacy eulogy often focuses upon the achievements that an individual leaves behind in this life. For example, whilst one could argue that Julius Cesar left behind an empire. Us simple mortals typically focus upon our families as for example, our wife, or husband, and children that one leaves behind. The people that are in essence our legacy.

 
Life Story
A Life story funeral speech or Life story eulogy Is very much a summary of the life of the deceased. More often than not, this approach often creates such positive feeling and emotion in a time when it is all too easy to only think about the pain and the loss at the funeral. A life story often informs people of many different things and fascinating facts that most people in attendance did not know, and reveal sides of the deceased that are not always known.
 

Memories
We all have memories of those we have loved and lost, and telling others of your memories is not simply telling those in attendance at the funeral about the deceased, but rather telling them about special moments and times that you shared together with them.

It often requries great emotional strength to write a funeral speech or eulogy with this approach because it is so touching and personal that when you begin to tell others, the memories also come flooding back and more often than not are overwhelming.

 
Funeral Poem
Many choose to read a poem of relevance at a funeral as a way to communicate and speak with those at the funeral. Either a favourite author of the deceased, or a poem which expresses the feelings one wishes to share. Albeit, joy, sadness, happiness, grief, fondness, or sorrow. A poem can in a few short lines capture feelings of worth.
 

A Reading at a Funeral
A reading is more often than not reciting a passage, or section from a book or sitation. A reading is much like a poem in that it seeks to express the feelings one wishes to share at the funeral and memories it wishes to leave behind in others.

 
With these various approaches in mind, as you walk and try to consider these options and which you feel is most relevant and appropriate Robert. Just write down brief thoughts as they occur. Do not try to sit down in front of a computer and expect it to all come flowing out. This is why I suggest going for a walk or going to a quiet place where you can breathe easy and just let emotions come out.

An important point to remember, is that many others will be grieving at the funeral. For this reason alone, and as a means of respect to the feelings of others, it is best to keep your speech short. You should aim not to exceed 5 minutes if possible Robert. It will also be very demanding on you as the orator, and so again in order to minimize the distress you also endure, try to keep your speech within a couple of minutes if at all possible.

Do not be fooled into believing that you don't need a speech or into thinking that you will simply be able to stand in the church, at the altar, or in the service, and be able to say all that you want to say. You will regret later not saying what you wished you could have said and the opportunity you had but missed.

I have myself sadly been to many funerals over the years. Many times someone has stood and wished to say a few words, only to then stand speechless. Unable to say what they wished to say, becoming increasingly distressed and distraught.

Prepare your speech or eulogy Robert. Write it down. Rehearse it. Get used to saying the words. Get used to the timing. Get used to the duration of the speech.

Preparing your funeral speech eulogy is so very important. It is a very emotional time. It is extremely easy to break down, or become overwhelmed with emotions. Please prepare and perhaps bring a copy of your speech together with you to give to your wife, or other relatives, in the event that you are unable to finish, this will allow someone else to do it for you.

Ultimately Robert, it not who says what at the funeral or remembrance service that is important. It is what is said. We are only human and everyone understands that it is a very emotional time. There will undoubtedly be many tears, and many who are deeply upset and in mourning.

A funeral speech, poem, reading, or eulogy, is merely the opportunity to share with others your feelings and to pay your respect to the deceased. Many will not have the strength to speak without tears, and so your funeral speech provides the opportunity for others to also feel as if their feelings can also be shared.

While many believe a eulogy is to commerate the deceased, I often feel the very finest funeral speeches are often those that celebrate them and bring us great comfort at a time of greatest sadness.
 
Wishing you all the very best on behalf of us all here at 123PPT.com.
Jonathan Stock
Presentation Consultant, www.123ppt.com
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