Help with my after dinner speech

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   Hi everyone!

I am to give an after dinner speech shortly, and wondered if you had any key tips or pointers.

Things to do and things to avoid.

Many thanks,

Francis Gazette

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office slave Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Newbie Joined: 06 Oct 2005 Online Status: Offline Posts: 5	Quote Reply Topic: Help with my after dinner speech Posted: 06 Oct 2005 at 11:05
	Hi everyone! I am to give an after dinner speech shortly, and wondered if you had any key tips or pointers. Things to do and things to avoid. Many thanks, Francis Gazette

Jonathan Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Newbie Joined: 22 Sep 2005 Online Status: Offline Posts: 19	Quote Reply Posted: 06 Oct 2005 at 12:27
	Hi Francis, after dinner speeches can always be a very strange affair. Typically the dinner guests have had a very good meal, very good wine, perhaps coffee and cognac, perhaps even cigars, and are very relaxed, bouyant and in jovial mood. Often after dinner speakers make the huge mistake of overly preparing and trying too hard. This is a common problem where the audience dinner guests are in one mind set and the speaker is in another. For whilst the audience has been feasting and enjoying the good food and wine, often the speaker has begun to think about their speech. "Will they laugh? Will they understand what I mean?" etc., and begins to become tense and a little nervous during the dinner and experiences smaller or larger anxieties that the audience is simply not in tune with. For whilst you may have some serious points and topics of discussions the key to a successful after dinner speech is most definitely in the manner in which you present and orate your key messages and arguments. Jonathan Stock, Presentation Consultant

office slave Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Newbie Joined: 06 Oct 2005 Online Status: Offline Posts: 5	Quote Reply Posted: 06 Oct 2005 at 13:01
	Thank you for your reply Jonathan. If I understand you correctly, you're saying that I need primarily to relax and enjoy the dinner along with the other guests in order to be on a similar wavelength? There are of course several important aspects to my speech Jonathan. Do you think it is better to instead remove these and keep the speech only light hearted? Many thanks, Francis Gazette

Jonathan Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Newbie Joined: 22 Sep 2005 Online Status: Offline Posts: 19	Quote Reply Posted: 06 Oct 2005 at 15:13
	Not all Francis, I imagine the very purpose of the speech is to inform the guests of some very important subjects, results, or thoughts. It is merely in the presentation of these that the speech will be a success or not. I am sure you have been to many after date speeches where the speaker rises at the end of the speech and as an uadience member you think to yourself. When will the speaker just sit down? And you feel that he is killing the whole atmosphere, and certainly by the end of the speech the audience is a great deal more sober and sadly somber with it. The key to a successful after dinner speech Francis is to realize where you are. Who you are talking. And most importantly to recognize the atmosphere that has not been created. You can choose to either continue to build the atmosphere which will create little resistance from the audience, or to break the flow and create a different atmosphere. whether this be from joking to suddenyl serious. Or from very laid back to more formal approaches. This will create friction Francis, and friction is never good for a presentation. Jonathan Stock, Presentation Consultant

office slave Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Newbie Joined: 06 Oct 2005 Online Status: Offline Posts: 5	Quote Reply Posted: 06 Oct 2005 at 15:21
	I see. I do of course wish to continue in the merry proceedings Jonathan in my after dinner speech, and of course will bear this in mind now in my preparation. Perhaps you have some thoughts regarding structure? Content? etc., Many thanks, Francis Gazette

Jonathan Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Newbie Joined: 22 Sep 2005 Online Status: Offline Posts: 19	Quote Reply Posted: 06 Oct 2005 at 17:47
	It was once said Francis that a successful after dinner speech has to be relevant, topical, fast, punchy, and funny to impress. I'm not certain if I totally subscribe to those thoughts necessarily. Certainly there are a number of requested professional after dinner speakers who almost give a performance and could touch upon and cover any topic or subject. You may wonder how this is possible Francis, as it's very formulated. Which again only goes to prove that in respect to after dinner speeches it's not necessarily the content of the speech which is of greatest importance. But more so the overall continuity in audience "good feeling" and atmosphere. So my first key point Francis is my most important. Make your speech entertaining. Choose the right material in that if you are going to discuss a serious topic do so in a less aggressive or direct manner. For example if a colleague is leaving your organization and you are giving an after dinner speech do not focus on the seriousness of the organizations loss. Or the gaps to be filled. Talk instead about how you now hope he is able to achieve his other ambitions and if your colleague should become president someday how you will come running with a request to be vice president or you'll tell all the press about how he started out working in your organization etc., In other words try to make light if possible of points that could easily be presented in a very serious manner. After dinner speeches provide a great means to throw up insults. But positive insults only. It is possible to focus on a negative aspect of someone and turn it into a positive thing. For example if someone is always late to work. Say how effective they must be int he morning gaining all that extra "coffee time" etc., Of course Francis, it's vitally important that you prepare your speech. In that I mean that you talk it through. Start a stop watch and give your speech reading it as normally as you would from your cue cards or print out. Don't race through it. Speak it as you would and see how long it takes. Remember a long after dinner speech is a sure party killer. Don't make your audience sober. Make them entertained. They shouldn't be sitting there waiting for you to stop so they can all race off to the bathroom. Remember people are consuming alcohol and you want their attention, not their minds thinking about toilet breaks. As an after dinner speaker, you are usually given a great honour Francis. To speak and address the guests. Remember this in your etiquette. After dinner jokes, stories, apt quotes, and expressions are all part of a successful after dinner speech Francis. But remember to balance your humour. Nothing is worse than a joke that falls completely flat and the forced ripple of nervous laughter. It is much better to tell an amusing funny and relevant story that has a funny conclusion that everyone is able to relate to than put yourself right out there and attempt a formal joke and punchline. At the start of my tips Francis I said how important it was to make your speech entertaining. Perhaps of equal importance is language. You must stay completely clear from offensive language. Whilst members within an audience may find coarse or vulgar language amusing, I guarantee other audience member will be offended. Sexism, profanties, religion, all have no place in your after dinner speech. Your audience is a unit. It is not something that you must try to view in pieces and make sections laugh. Other sections will most definitely be offended. A successful after dinner speech entertains and embodies your audience. Don't make your audience listen for more than they have to. Don't make them uncomfortable and don't make members feel alienated. Enjoy your honour an a speaker. Show this in the way you speak. Smile. Give toast. And most importantly don't try to create friction. Continue the flow of the evening, and become the talk of the dinner. Jonathan Stock, Presentation Consultant